That Guy.

As a professional college student, I've learned a thing or two in my day about taking pictures at parties. There are unspoken rules which we all must obide by, and here, in no particular order, are the most important.

1. If you are a girl posing with fellow females, be sure to get as close together as possible and make the kissy face.
2. If you are a bro posing with fellow bros, hold up your beer if you have one...and if not, throw up the horns.
3. If you happen to be in the background while one of the aforementioned photos are taking place, do all you can to avoid being...

THAT GUY.

"That guy" is the creeper in the background of many party pictures. The most severe cases of That Guy occurs when said dude happens to glance at the photographer at the exact moment of snapshot, causing a creepy, staring look on his face when really he probably just was cruising by. But have no fear, because there are multiple ways to avoid being That Guy and being made fun of forever.

The first way to avoid having an unwarranted stalker reputation is to not look. Use those peripherals, guys! Think you see a group of people posing out of the corner of your eye? Don't look until you see the flash! This one is the easiest way to avoid becoming That Guy.

The second way to lighten the situation is to make a face. I know, it sounds ridiculous, but at least you can act like you were trying to be funny.

Personally, I like "that guys." I think my favorite photos are the ones with some poor, innocent bystander creepin' in the background. It always gets a good laugh, and frankly, we've all been "that guy" once in our lives.

★★★★★

Pop Music.

We all have music on our iPods that we don't want anyone to see. For me, it might be every Britney Spears song ever recorded. Or perhaps it's Lindsay Lohan's latest song, "Bossy." Regardless, I know all of you have a secret song that you jam out to in your cars when you think no one's looking. This song might be something that you discovered while "accidentally" listening to HOT 99.5 the other day, or perhaps one of the girls in your Bio lab was singing it incessantly to the point where you had NO CHOICE but to go home and download it! There's no shame in that. My point here is this...

At some point in everyone's life, you will fall victim to liking some form of pop music.

Believe it or not, a lot of people find this fact embarrassing. This is because when many people think of pop music, they envision this:

(Image courtesy of themusicstories.com)

I would be embarrassed too, if this were the real definition of pop music. But it's not. Pop music stands for "popular music," therefore any song or band that is "mainstream" or popular to the point where they are on the radio, on MTV, or selling out huge venues for concerts -- they could be considered "pop."

Pop music is no longer synonymous with bubblegum dance music. It's artists like John Mayer, Kanye West, Coldplay, Keith Urban and John Legend. These artists that produce music in genres like alternative, country, and hip hop are now also being categorized as pop.
(Image courtesy of Breakpoint.es)

So while many of you out there actually tend to listen to music that is by no means considered mainstream, a lot of us out here are guilty of listening to pop music. And does that make us conformed consumers of a money-hungry society? Maybe. But if giving up secretly listening to my NOW 5 CD means I can be cool, than I'd rather not be.

Miley Cyrus.

For a few years, there seemed to be a lacking of wholesome, tween-friendly celebrity role models in the world. Girls as young as ten and eleven were looking up to scandalous, moral-hating, BELLY-BUTTON EXPOSING women such as Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera. Just before things could get any worse, a light beckoned down from the heavens and graced us with none other than....

MILEY CYRUS.

Young, innocent, pure Miley. Daughter of one-hit-wonder Billy Ray Cyrus, she hit the scene on the Disney Channel hit show, Hannah Montana. And little girlies everywhere freaked. Some say that the merch sold purely from the Hannah Montana empire saved the economy from hitting "depression" status.

And then...something happened. Maybe it was the Disney Channel curse. Just look at Brit and Xtina. But no one expected it from loveable, giggly, baby-toothed Miles. While some people think that she was just a growing, teenage girl who was discovering her body for the first time...others called it Myspace. Suddenly, the pictures were everywhere. Not just of Smiley Miley in her pool, but pictures of her lifting her shirt to expose her Limited Too training bra, and laying on BOY'S LAPS! Mothers everywhere united, protesting Hannah Montana and her dirty, dirty deeds.
(Image courtesy of HotGossip.com)

Since the leaking of these photos, Miley has been the center of many tabloid controversies. And since I am on a roll here, let's make a list, shall we?

• The scandalous Vanity Fair photoshoot, wherein Miley posed "topless"
• Photo of Miley purposefully slanting her eyes, causing mass hysteria in the Asian community
• Hannah Montana Chocolate Granola bars being recalled due to suspected salmonella contamination
• Miley Cyrus Fan Club members being snubbed out of promised "first dibs" on concert tickets
• 16-year-old Miley dates 21-year-old Justin Gaston, a model who has recently posed in various sexual poses and magazines.
• Miley causes a stir in the gay community when she takes over Disneyland for her "Sweet 16" during what is usually the annual Gay Day.

(Image courtesy of Vanity Fair.)

I literally could go on for at least 84 more bullets, but I think you get the drift.

Hannah Montana. Miley Cyrus. Whoever you are, I rate you two stars, because no one else on earth has caused this much drama before they were legally able to drive. No one.

★★

Rock of Love.

Reality TV is nothing new. Ever since Survivor: Borneo debuted in 2000, people have been bringing "reality" to television in every shape and form possible. Reality dating shows have proved to be some of the more popular forms of RealiTV, especially those shows whose bachelor/bachelorette is a celebrity.

Which leads me to the latest craze in Celebrity-Dating-Reality-TV:

Rock of Love.

This show, hosted by none other than Bret Michaels, takes America's finest ladies into one single house (or in the case of this season, a bus) and Bret gets to pick and choose who his faves are and who will not stay in his house, and continue to rock his world. Now, if you have never seen this show and have absolutely no idea what kinds of girls are on this show, please let me elaborate a little:

THESE GIRLS SCARE THE DAYLIGHTS OUT OF ME!

One girl has pins sticking out of her face, most of their chests could be used as floating devices, and all of their hair is fake! Its absolutely...fabulous!

But anyway, I have to admit something: this makes for wonderful reality tv! I can't tell you how many times me and my friends or boyfriend have found ourselves watching episode after episode of Rock of Love. This is one trendy TV show that I, admittedly so, watch almost relgiously.

So, for this show, I give 5 out of 5 stars (gasp!) because as much as I try to not watch it, I can't stand not knowing who Bret Michaels chose to share eyeliner with.

★★★★★

Girl Scout Cookies.

I come from a family of sweet-tooths (sweet-teeth?). If there's one thing my family cares about, it's how to get a quick fixin' for our cravings. And there is one season, one time of year that is looked forward to more than Christmas and Thanksgiving combined as far as sweets go...

Girl scout cookie season.

That is why I have decided, for your viewing pleasure, to discuss with you and rate these treats, to help people of all kinds, and to live by the girl scout law.

1. Thin Mints
Thin mints are described as being round, mint flavored cookies covered in dark chocolate. Dark chocolate?? Whaaaa? I am not a fan of dark chocolate, but there is something about these cookies that make me want to marry the next person I see. In fact, funny story, I used to hate these cookies. Now, put down your weapons and rocks because I was a young, stupid girl at one point and everyone gets a "Get out of jail free" card, am I right? But yeah, these cookies are obviously the most popular of the GSC's, with good reason. I rate these 5 out of 5 for pure popularity, simplicity, and PMS-friendliness.
★★★★★

2. Samoas or Caramel Delights
You guys, this was so hard for me to rank these as number two. The perfected mixture of coconut, chocolate, caramel in a tiny donut shape makes me loopy. I can't even tell you how many times these cookies have helped me through the worst exam cram nights, break ups, and slumber parties. Besides expanding my waist line, these cookies expanded my heart...for girl scouts. I now actually care about the girl scouts because of these cookies. I also give these 5 out of 5 stars, because in a perfect world, this would be the only food available.
★★★★★

3. Do-Si-Dos
Without going into the entire background of my weird eating choices, I am not a huge fan of peanut butter in some things, like Reeses cups. Maybe it's the peanut butter and chocolate combo. ANYWAY. In regular cookie world, peanut butter cookies are my absolute favie! The girl scout version of my heart in cookie form are called Do-Si-Dos, and they measure up pretty nicely to the competition. Only downside: veryyy crumbly. (But what peanut butter cookies aren't?) I rate these 4 out of 5 stars, because they can kick any peanut butter craving you have right in the crotch.
★★★★

4. Tagalongs
Like I said previously, I'm not huge on the chocolate-peanut butter combo. But one of my good friends could seriously eat nothing but these Tagalongs for the rest of her god forsaken life. Now, I don't know if it's because everytime we hang out she pulls a box of these bad boys out of her purse, but the more we hang out, the more I appreciate Tagalongs. I give them 3 out of 5 stars, because there are DEF other GSC's I'd rather eat.
★★★

Honorable mentions include: Lemonades, Sugar-Free Chocolate Chips, and Dulche De Leche's.

(Images courtesy of Girlscoutcookies.org)

Horoscopes.

Although everyone may not know theirs, everyone has a horoscope. From Gemini to Capricorn, these astrological symbols don't just represent the star alignment you were born under..they reveal who you are.


Zodiac Sign pinback buttons
Originally uploaded by jnhkrawczyk

In almost every women-oriented publication you come across, somewhere in there is your daily star reading. These usually reveal how your day will go as far as work and love, and sometimes try to reinforce your belief in them by giving you some vague characteristic you supposedly have.

Many read these horoscopes religiously, as if these mini-predictions were the be-all, end-all of their future. Others, on the other hand, think...well...


Astrology is bull
Originally uploaded by thebadastronomer

Personally, I do not see the harm in reading these every now and then for fun. However, just because I have found that almost NONE of mine tend to be accurate, I do not believe in horoscopes or that my star sign determines what kind of person I am.

I will rate this trend a 3 out of 5 stars though, because I think that The Onion's take on horoscopes is probably one of the funniest things to ever happen to me.

★★★